Meet a mom who is using creative means to keep her children engaged.

At the beginning of the year we had the privilege of hosting a Passport to Learning Workshop for a group of parents and professionals.  While exploring different ways and tips of keeping our children motivated, Zurayda  Maneveld inspired the group with some out of the box ideas that motivated her children and gave them the emotional support they needed.  We do hope you are inspired and encouraged by her story below:

I have 2 children, Uzair my son of 12 and Emaan my daughter of 10 and both of them are on the Autistic Spectrum. It’s been a long journey, but we’ve used this opportunity to keep learning and experimenting.  We encourage participation in the way they would like us as their parents to discipline them and set rules at home. We negotiate outcomes and goals. Mom and Dad however still have to make the final decisions, with their consultation, and this is our responsibility as parents.

The goal in our household is to be motivating and encouraging with our children through little acts to keep them engaged and eager to learn. I believe this will empower them to independently manage their roles that they hold and the roles that await them. This will also give them the tools to be able to identify the different roles people have and so respect themselves and others for this.

I believe that with consistent encouragement and motivation, my children are learning their self-worth. We have taught them that despite their limitations or restrictions, they too have responsibilities and can contribute to their surroundings. Encouraging them to explore and experience different styles we experiment with at home, has developed their knowledge, planning and decision making. Motivating and encouraging without judgement has improved their self-esteem and enabled them to cope with their feelings. They feel safe, loved and free to explore what is awaiting them as they grow.

A little sweet treat stuck to the fridge door, with a note, “a treat when you’ve completed your homework!”  When they open their lunch box at school a little note that reads, “Made with love to help you grow into the wonderful person you are becoming!”  A “High 5” at home, when Emaan comes downstairs and says she brushed her hair. I inspect with deep attention so that she sees I am interested in her achievement.  “Well done baby girl, you did a great job.”

Uzair struggles to tie his laces and with enthusiasm, “Emaan, you have a cool trick in tying your laces, teach your brother, he might like that”. She is so excited that she too can teach her older brother something. I will then let Uzair know that it took great effort for her to teach him. What does he think about thanking her and telling her how cool she is? “Thanks Emaan, you cool!” Uzair would say and she would light up with a smile.

Getting done for school can be quite a task for them. I have setup a checklist for them to check in the morning and this keeps me sane as it gets them dressed and groomed. On this list you would find stuff like: Brushed my teeth, put my shoes on, etc. Downstairs is another checklist. This one has things like: took my vitamins, homework book signed, packed lunch, PT uniform in bag, grab my bag as I leave for school, will do my best to have a great day. They let me know if they managed to tick all the boxes, and this gets a “high 5” or a peck on the cheek, with a “you’re doing a great job, I love what you becoming”. And the smiles I get in return is motivation and encouragement enough for me to keep doing my job.